You're the Parent and You're In Charge of YOU
Jul 22, 2019
Have you ever felt like you were out of control? Acting against your own will?
You set goals for yourself and meticulously lay out the plans to accomplish them...
And then, without warning, the next day you are doing the exact OPPOSITE of what you planned!
The "technical" reason you do this is because It's a battle between your primitive (animal) brain and your pre-frontal cortex (human brain).
The way *I* explain it, however, is that it's the "parent" version of you and the "kiddo" version of you.
The Parent You knows what's best long-term, makes solid plans, has your best interest at heart, is full of wisdom and solid reasoning.
The Kiddo You likes instant gratification, knows what she wants and wants it NOW, whines and complains and negotiates. She doesn't understand why you're such a buzzkill. "But it's NOT FAIR!"
Once you realize this, it becomes much easier to handle your kiddo brain.
You get an urge to eat something off your meal plan for the day (courtesy of "kiddo" who just reeeeeally wants that cookie)... You hop into "parent" mode, acknowledge the request, and then lovingly remind yourself that, "That's not what we planned."
Kiddo brain will kick and scream. She may even negotiate with you. But you're the parent here - you're in charge. You know what's best.nSo you pat that kiddo on the head, deny her request and continue about your day.
The more you do this, the less intense the kiddos' demands will be. The more she will just give up without much of a fight because she knows "Mom is just gonna say 'no'."
And just like you LOVE your kiddos and you make decisions that are best for their long-term wellbeing, EVEN WHEN those decisions are not popular or fun or appreciated in the moment... you make decisions for yourself from a place of love and long-term wellbeing.
You're the parent. You ARE in charge.
Is there something in your life that you want to change? An urge to eat unhealthy stuff? A compulsive desire to gossip or complain about your Ex? Incessantly replaying the past in your mind, while you lay in bed at 4am, seemingly captive?
Use this analogy. See how it goes! And remember that you are doing all of this from a place of total (self) LOVE. <3