I don’t know if you’ve ever thought about this, but did you know you create manuals in your mind for your expectations of how you think your husband, kids, parents, etc. should behave?
The problem with these manuals are we write them in our mind, but never communicate them to whomever they apply to. We just expect those individuals to know how to follow them.
I know some of you are thinking, “but you can’t change a person, how am I going to change my ex-husband?”
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Today I want to talk to you about how you can change your ex husband. Dun dun dun. Literally how you can make him less annoying. Easier to work with. Proactive. Make him more helpful. Anything you want to do or change about him. That's what we're talking about today.
I want you to think about your ex and think of all the things you'd like him to do. Then I want you to ask yourself why you want him to act that way. If we had a magic wand and we can magically just make him change to do all of the things that you want him to do and stop doing the things you don't want him to do how do you think you'd feel.
Why do we want people to behave in certain ways? Think about that for a second why do you want your ex to behave in a certain way? Why do you want your kids to behave in a certain way? When you keep drilling down you're going to find that the reason that we want anyone to behave in any particular way is because how we think it's going to make us feel.
The manual that you're telling yourself that he should pay child support for x y and z reasons. That actual thought pattern is what's preventing you from feeling the relief or the security or justification or whatever that feeling is that you're seeking. If you stick with your manual you're sticking with those crappy feelings.
For adult humans we really ultimately can't force them to do anything, or change in any way. What do we have control over. And if you think about it what we have control over is how we think and feel. We have control over our own expectations our own beliefs our own thoughts.
When I went through my own divorce, I discovered that the "help" that was out there was either very heavily based on dragging up the past OR slapping a positive affirmation on top of every shitty thought.
Uh, no thank you. Hard pass.
I knew there had to be a better way:
A way for people like me - driven, high-achieving women who were ready to conquer this "divorce thing" once and for all - to stop focusing on the past and start building a genuinely fun, incredible life NOW. A way for us to heal and move on without freaking CRYING every single day.
Heck, throw in some laughs, and you've got me totally sold!
That's when I discovered a method that did ALL of that.
And the rest was magic. (like, Hermione magic, not crappy Ron magic)
Today, everything I do is with the sole purpose of helping other women use my coaching method and tools to create a life and future they LOVE.
If you're ready to capture some of this magic for yourself, hit me up!
Women are moving on and upgrading their lives every day. It's YOUR turn now.WORK WITH ME NOW
Look at any kind of situation with your ex and create a new set of thoughts that helps you feel even slightly better it's actually has nothing to do with him and everything to do with you.
Whether it's a nosy neighbor or your delightful Ex-mother-in-law, people are gonna ask...
And now YOU will have the perfect answer!